Alisa's a mommy!! (I'm late in discovering this...)

Banner Day!

I've got a job interview Wednesday!! It's in broadcasting, too, so maybe that BA won't be going unused the rest of my career. Must...not...get...hopes...up. Very difficult!

Had lunch with the ladies I used to work with--lots of fun, including a mojito! The former partner of the company was bitching about the one who shut the place down--heehee.

Tried on clothes for the interview. I bought a brown jacket and was trying to get slacks to match. There was every size but a 12. I tried on a 10, just for a laugh, and I got them on with no problems, even got them fastened. Well, they were a little snug-looking, and they were stretch pants, but I still felt pretty good about it. I wound up going to another location of the store and buying the 12, but I think size 10 is in my future again!

After all these happy things plus a nice fat-free latte, I was walking down the hall toward the parking lot. Then...I walked around the giant paddlewheel replica playground with lots of chubby-cheeked squealing kids. No, I didn't dissolve in a teary heap in the middle of the mall. I just sighed. A lot. Like I'm doing now.

I know, I know. The world needs room for "Not-so-average Jane gets an Extreme Makeover then survives not getting to marry a millionaire, but goes on to murder Simon, gets paroled by a jury of her peers and then returns to a simple life" show. But why'd they have to cancel "Ed?" I really like that show. I want to live in Stuckeyville and have a pie shop. I want funny friends who speak in one-liners. I'm OK with "Friends" and "Frasier" going away because they've been on for so long, although I really like both of them. I know it's better to watch less TV, but it's been such a habit all my life.

Here's what I watch:

Sunday: "The Simpsons", "Malcolm in the Middle", "Arrested Development"--a very funny show if you haven't seen it.

Monday: nothing really. "Las Vegas" is kind of entertaining, but last week's episode reminded me of some corny 60s show: "Hey, Brooks & Dunn, since you're just hanging around in our restaurant, why don't you play for us?"

Tuesday: "Frasier" and "24". Because of my antenna/satellite setup, I generally tape "24" while watching "Frasier". Won't have to do that next year.

Wednesday: "That 70s Show"

Thursday: "Friends", "Scrubs" I watch "Will & Grace" some, but don't go out of my way to, and I don't tape it.

Friday: "Ed" (for the next 2 wks :( ), and "Monk"

Saturday: nothing--maybe a movie

We still sit in front of the tube most nights, but usually watch satellite stuff--sometimes "Queer Eye", Comedy Central (I really like "Insomniac"), and other various and sundry programs. Need to turn that thing off more!

Speaking of the TV habit, one of the things that started mine oh so many years ago was "Captain Kangaroo". I'm very sad Bob Keeshan is gone. I'm not immersed in kids' programming, but it doesn't seem there are many live adults on shows except for Sesame Street. I know there are some others, but very few. I realize that the Captain and Mr. Rogers were kind of corny, but they were nice, gentle role models and I'm sure many kids (myself not included) didn't have that at home. I'll miss him.

My friend, the bossy one with 2 kids conceived without assistance (that I know of), now says we'll have an easier time getting a baby if we're also willing to take an older child. When are they going to materialize? Is she going to build an extra room for us? Is she going to chip in for extra clothes and education? Hmmmm??

Ick. I had a sex dream last night. It involved me, G, and another man. He was a future boss, I think, but he was a combination of the GM at the place where I've been freelancing for 3 years and a non-existent person. It was all for me, there was no man-on-man action, but it was not really very enjoyable. WEIRD!!!

I'm feeling triumphant at having identified The Cure as the performers of the song in the HP ad ("Pictures of You"). G though it was Modern English. I've never been very hip in my musical tastes. If you want a hint, I own every Air Supply album. It's OK. I also have Duke Ellington, deBussy, Miles Davis, all kinds of stuff. My favorites are 60s and 70s pop, though, even though I was born in 1965. We played some college rock on our college radio station when I was in college, but it was only about 30 percent, the other 70 being Top 40 (for the most part). I still need help with the Mitsubishi ad. I think it's talking about "the most beautiful face". Is it John Lennon? It sounds like "Mind Games". Help me, please!

Oh, yeah, wasn't pregnant, of course. AF came 1/10. So the dizzy spell must've been a tumor, or hypochondria. ;p

I had become very bored with myself--hence my lack of blogging. I've also been feeling like I've been spending a little too much time with other people's blogs instead of accomplishing something. I have a problem with inertia anyway, and if I'm sitting at the computer reading, I tend to stay there quite awhile. It's also hit me that I've been going pretty far afield of my original intent, which was to chronicle my IVF for my future child(ren), and since that wasn't a success and other things started to come apart (my employment status and financial stability), I've been preoccupied with that, not that there's anything wrong with that!

So...to update, no job yet. Except for the money part, I'm not sad to have a little time to myself. It will get old soon, though. I am doing a little freelance work with a video company, helping with a satellite teaching broadcast every 2 weeks. It's good to get out of the house and do something like that, plus it can go on my resume. I sent out a resume last week that I'm hopeful about, but I haven't had a reply yet. It's an Exec. Admin. Asst. position, and I was trying to get away from the Admin positions, but this might be different. It's with a large company less than 2 miles where I live. I think it would probably pay pretty well, at least compared to my old position, and I feel that the opportunities for advancement would be there. I'm going to call or email to follow up tomorrow.

There's a local adoption fair on February 1st, but I'm not sure whether to plan to go or not. There was one in another town that I'd wanted to attend in the fall, but G didn't think there was any point since we couldn't afford to start anything yet. I agreed, but wanted to go anyway. I want to go this one, at least for awhile, but won't be able to stay long, as it's my grandmother's 94th birthday. She's been going downhill for the last few months, and it's important for me to go.

That's it for the most part. I've been missing reading about everyone, so I'll skim through some blogs, and check back in here every few days.

Red-faced. Embarrassed. I realize that my scolding someone else for their comments makes me far worse than those whom I'm scolding. I don't know what sparked last night's mood. And I'm certainly the coward, because it's doubtful that I would speak like that to someone in person. It's much easier to see myself in the light of day. I deleted my offensive post of last night, but will hide it somewhere for myself.

Had a little dizzy spell yesterday. Automatically assumed that 1) I must have a brain tumor or 2) I must be pregnant. Because it couldn't possibly be that I have an inner ear disorder, or I'm getting a cold or the flu. Or that the TMJ (I think) that's making my jaw hurt could be the culprit. No, that couldn't possibly be it. Much too simple